If You're in the Wrong, Admit it
(One of the 10 difficult behaviors that represent normal people at their worst, The Tank is confrontational, pointed, and angry, the ultimate in pushy and aggressive behavior.)
All of the preceding suggestions assume that the Tank is wrong about you. But what if the Tank is right on target? What if you were wasting time, money, or energy on unfocused and inappropriate activities? If ever the Tank's accusations about you are true, then a simple three-step strategy will suffice to solve your problem. The fastest way to end the shooting is to:
- Admit to your mistake.
- State briefly what you've learned from your experience.
- State what you will do differently in the future to prevent it from happening again.
Step 3 is crucial. Many people have successfully done Steps 1 and 2, only to be frustrated by a continued attack. But consider this from the Tank's point of view. If the Tank is concerned that the unfocused activity may happen again in the future, they may resume the attack based on their fear of a repeat performance. Your assurance that the lesson is learned is essential to bringing the attack to a halt. But once you've given your assurance, then stop talking about it. Tanks don't require and cannot tolerate sniveling and groveling. It takes courage to admit a mistake and to learn from it. So stand tall, soldier.
From:
The Art of Communication
© 2007 Dr. Rick Kirschner
PWW-019-004457